where does time go?

Posted on April 29, 2008 by sylvied

It has been a while since it has been the two of us. I have no idea where the time has gone over the last few weeks, all I know is that I have been  losing track of it. I am pretty good at time management but It feels as if I have been somehow robbed of time.

Guilt cripples at every opportunity and I don’t really know where it is coming from. I seem to be forever planning ahead, every minute of the day is being utilized in order to get closer to some  kind  of “target” that I impose on myself.

Work has been an ongoing and unfinished  tapestry of threads that all need care and attention, children are yet another ongoing source of anxiety and challenges, future  is wrapped by  a big question mark that leaves me unsettled  and  scared. As I am typing these words, the little  voice inside is already hard at work trying to make sense of all my unfounded fears and self doubts….it will pass no doubt…

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8 Responses to “where does time go?”

  1. Hunter, on April 29th, 2008 at 12:44 am Said:

    you have fun blog

  2. Daddy Papersurfer, on April 29th, 2008 at 8:59 am Said:

    When everything is unsettled and unfinished, I crave for calm and order and when that’s achieved I get bored and deliberately look for chaos again - it doesn’t seem to change much over the years.
    Panic attacks are best controlled by chocolate and fine wine [or in my case malt whisky] - this is a scientific fact. If anyone queries this, just tell them “DP said so” - tee hee

    *hugs*

  3. Ghosty, on April 29th, 2008 at 12:20 pm Said:

    I often seem to be right where you describe yourself. Sounds to me like a vacation is in order!

  4. sylvied, on April 29th, 2008 at 12:49 pm Said:

    DaddyP: your description applies to my life too!…hehe…thank you for the wine and chocolate advice…I like drinking when I am happy but not when I am sad (the result is rather scary) the hugs are taken ;) I think Ghosty could be right about vacation thanks guys your words are warming and at least my friend Hunter thinks my blog is funny :)
    x

  5. betty, on April 30th, 2008 at 3:53 pm Said:

    get yourself down to the beach and dig your toes in the sand, or feel the grass tickle your soles. Getting ‘connected’ with the earth really helps. Other than that, the wine and chocolate sound like a good idea. We are all so hard on ourselves sometimes, trying to ‘have it all’. Sometimes, ‘having a bit’ and enjoying it is a much healthier option. This will pass, the sun will come out and your heart will sing again.

  6. 70steen, on April 30th, 2008 at 8:56 pm Said:

    so that is what you, me and DP have in common? When things are quiet I get bored so take on another stretching challenge only to berate myself for doing it as I strangely yearn for calm ….. (e.g. had a demanding job, long hours, no time… changed to less demanding job but took on other things so still no time …. such is lifes rich tapestry

    I agree with Ghosty a good holiday is needed
    Take care 70s x

  7. sylvied, on May 1st, 2008 at 1:09 am Said:

    Betty, is that Betty the moving to La Rochelle Betty? or am I totally losing the plot?! Very good point, it is not so much that I try to have it all
    but more a feeling of overload, again that’s just life and there are days when i feel I could take on anything and other times when I feel less capable of handling pressure. Again pressure is so relative from one individual to another…a connection with nature is most definitely on the agenda ;) Thank you for your comment :)

    70:I think we have a lot in common lol you are right, I would like to concentrate a bit more on living in the present, as a child time seems to be such an abstract notion and a week feels like an eternity, I have not seen where 2007 went, but that’s probably because so many things where achieved in many aspects so I think I will allow some much needed time for a bit of reflection on it. Thanks for your advice and ear x

  8. shinade, on May 1st, 2008 at 5:29 pm Said:

    Oh Slyvie,
    I am here alone most of the time. Walter is on the road and our children are all grown.

    Yet, I too still find myself unable to keep my self imposed schedule as well.

    Everyday, I set my schedule to visit as many as I can here at FMB, work on my graphics…which BTW…I never seem to get completed, dishes are sometimes left in the sink which I detest, oh my the list could go on forever.

    You are not alone. This what I always tell my daughter when she is overwhelmed with her teaching schedule and life in general.

    You just have to know that you have done your best, say it out loud to yourself and then let it go, and, take a break.

    I am contiually amazed by both you and Kevin. I know I could not even begin to keep up with your schedule!!

    But, just know that from the outside….you are in fact doing a fantastic job. Of this I am truly convinced!!

    here’s wishes for a day at the beach or even better yet…a romantic get away!! :-)
    XX’S,
    Jackie

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